Sunday, May 17, 2009

Dane Cook is what's wrong with us.

I'm taking a break from my usual blogging to cover something I think is very important.

I believe Dane Cook is the least funny comedian on the planet.  I would rather count the wrinkles on my dog's balls than watch this man's comedy.  I would rather be on jury duty than watch this man's comedy.  I would rather go to the DMV then watch this man's comedy.  I...

I think you get the picture.

His comedy has absolutely no depth, no clever bits of insight, and somehow not even punch-lines.  He gets off on running around the stage and yelling.  He's a dick.  He's an ignorant religious zealot.  And he's what's wrong with you, me, this country, and probably most of the planet
There I said it.  You probably hate me now. 
And if he was just unfunny, then I could deal with it.  Not being funny is no crime, (except the fact he makes millions not doing it.)  But I honestly believe he is (or portrays) the worst traits of the human being.  Let me explain.
In his average special, Dane Cook runs around for anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour screaming.  About nothing.  It's all just the same garbage material we've all heard before.
And this is a real problem I see amongst people.  We waste words.  We don't value them, because we think we always have more.  We talk over each other to fill in our useless two cents.  All to say something with absolutely no relevance to, well, anything.  No funny, no wit, no truth, no knowledge.  Just mouth garbage flying out your mouth.  And that's Dane Cook.
And then there is the ignorance.  He puts down Atheists.  He talks about how their ideas are stupid, and not even in clever ways.  "You become a tree, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA."  Fuck you Dane Cook.  You're a close-minded psychopath who should be shot in the face.  I'm not an Atheist, but you're not a Christian.  
While you are on paper, you forget the most important bits of Christ's message.  Understanding and acceptance.  Really, you're just a dick.  And you're what's wrong with US.

Reader, thank you for your time.


Anonymous said...

I think that conflict, or at least differences are what makes things funny and interesting. Dane Cook is not funny, I can't emphasize that enough, but I think his premise isn't really flawed, it's just taken to an extreme - and that's what makes him funny to some people.

I've read your posts, and it seems that you're really into morality. I think the idea of morality is valid, but only if it encompasses the immoral as well and doesn't cast the immorals out as sinners, because that's one thing that perpetuates immorality - does that make sense?

Immorality is caused by stress in people's lives - it is my view that people act in a "wrong" way towards others because of hardship in their lives that they haven't overcome yet, or simply has just given them a different perspective and attitude. To cast "mean" people out, to deride them, is to deride the state that has made them mean, and that is to deride humanity, which would be immoral itself.

I don't know, I could just be too tolerant of assholes. It's definitely not fun to be around a douchey individual.

ntap said...

Shit - by the way that last comment was left by me, Nick Grinder.